Meditation Opens Doorway To The Soul Realization.

Realization was completely absent within my life for the first thirty years of existing on this
planet, I used the word existing quite deliberately  as it was not living for me, just an existence
I endured for thirty years. I never realized anything in that time, instead I just felt. I felt anxious,
about existence, why was I here? What's the point to all this misery? Felt inadequate,  awkward,
uneasy about doing, or going anywhere, lost, alone, afraid, where was the joy? Where was the
carefree life, all I felt were feelings, and ninety nine per cent of those were negative .I  was addicted
to my feelings, addicted to the "I" that was "poor little old me" pray lord hold me excused for all
I think,say, and do, you would be messed up if you had a life like mine, I was sucked into a vortex
of ever narrowing spirals waiting to be spat out at the end in life termination, Hallelujah I would
then escape all this crap, and sink into oblivion!
It was not to be thankfully, for on top of the other addictions I had acquired, there was also another
one, (addictions you know are like grapes, they come in bunches) Alcohol was my friend for a few
years then it turned round and bit my ass with a furious bite, which made me sick in mind, body,
and soul, it took me to the point of insanity and bewildered fear, with just a half turn left on the
screw of the vortexes spiral, which equated with being given three months left to live by my doctor.
It was at this point, after a year in hospital getting what ,was left of my head straight, and getting
help for my alcohol addiction from others who were like me, but were now living sober and contented lives, I started attending groups and paying attention to what they shared from their hearts.
Meditation some how found me, and I felt immediately attracted to it, for the first time in thirty years
I turned my gaze away from what was out there, and looked within. I found  an opening into another
dimension of being, the little scared boy that was looking in from the outside, met the inner me who
was kind loving patient, and reassuring, This started a journey that I have been experiencing for well
over forty years now, and now I am realizing much more than ever before, and the feelings are more
positive and joyful now, meditation is a process of experiencing the journey from "I" to all, and also
experiencing the joy of soul realization and the knowingness that comes with this, as you feel and know that you are divine, because you personally experience it, I would sincerely wish all you who take the trouble to read this far, to take up meditation, learn to come alive ,be  born again in the joy
of just being alive and awake!
warmest regards Michael.
kirkpatrickmichael17@gmail.com any comments welcome, face book page soul realization.